Generating instant rapport (part 3 in the series)

If you find our posts useful, don't forget to subscribe to our RSS Feeds or Email Updates

**Note: this is the third part in a five-part series on getting off to the right start in appointments.

Previous articles in the series:

• Generating instant credibility.
• Start appointments right.

First of all, rapport begins and ends with your interest in others. If you find people, as a general rule, are irritating, annoying, or boring, you’re not going to make this work. You may make sales here and there, but you want to build a strong customer base, right?

And on that note…Life is more interesting for you and those you engage in conversation with when you have two more things on your side: 1) variety, and 2) personal interests. Hobbies, favorite sports teams, musical instruments you play, great books you’ve read, current events, amazing places you’ve traveled, children and their talents, the list goes on. These things provide for sparks in the conversation. See if you can tell where as you read on.
Assuming you like people, and you’re willing to show an interest in them, here are 9 suggestions for making rapport-building an easier task for you.

1. Be the first to extend your hand, to smile, and to say hello. A warm greeting can soften any difficult morning a buyer has had. All three elements should be present in that first moment.
2. Make reference to your “place” in the situation. Share a positive, personal feeling or goal about the current occasion, with open body language, and ask about that person’s feelings or goals. A simple statement to express could be, “I’m so glad to finally meet you in person. ?” Above all, try to avoid the weather, everyone talks about it. You can also find a reason to offer a genuine compliment, followed by a question.
3. Extend the conversation. You can briefly explore a tangent of whatever feeling or goal the other person shares in order to bond emotionally, and possibly, to discover commonalities between you and him or her.
4. Avoid “down” subjects. Don’t complain about the weather, or that it’s Monday, or for any reason.
5. Keep a good balance between self-disclosure and open-ended questions about the other person. The self-disclosure is necessary to send the message that you’re safe to talk to, that’s okay to open up. But then the focus needs to return to the buyer, not you. Be careful not to get into a back-and-forth of one-upmanship.
6. Make other people feel special. Follow-up comments and, occasionally, compliemnts, to their self-disclosure comments help them continue to feel safe and warm. For example, “It’s so great for you to dedicate time to your kids like that. I know they’ll appreciate it down…though maybe down the road!”
7. Become like the other person for a short period of time. Two people who have similar personalities almost always hit it off despite cultural, religious, or political differences. I’m not saying you need to become someone you’re not, but you should be an adapter. You should be flexible.
8. Don’t try too hard. Overeagerness is actually turnoff. Trying to be too funny, or overly polite, comes across as patronizing. Be genuine and sincere.

Nick Boothman wrote a great book titled, How to Connect in Business in 90 Seconds or Less. It’s a must-read for sales professionals. Buy this book and master these principles to make that first appointment get off to the right start.